Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
