She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
