actually, I'm a sock model
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
