I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
