4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
