I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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