shes about as inviting as chlamydia
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
