Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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