we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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