Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize