Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
oh god the rape fog is back!
I have demons in me.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
