ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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