After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
try to milk me bitch
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
