you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
