I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I need a burrito and a hug.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
