why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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