I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
