just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
