That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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