he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
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