Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
