so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
