in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
