dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
