Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
