Jerry, you need to find god
I want to make a zoo with you.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
