yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
