I wish I only lived at night.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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