I must be too annoying 4 u.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
