was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
