You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
