His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
