the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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