What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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