i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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