he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
