he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
