3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
