Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
