If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
