she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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