I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
