sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Randomize
