i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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