so explain again why im purple
no
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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