you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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