He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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