when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize