Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
