I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
